Immaculate contraception's avatar

Immaculate contraception

Forest, 19, Berkeley

Theme by Theme Static
  • Me:

    Where are the owls? WHERE ARE THE OWLS?

  • Hooters Waitress:

    Please sir, you're causing a fuss and disturbing the other customers-

  • Me:

    *banging my hands rhythmically on the table* WHERE-ARE-THE-OWLS? WHERE-ARE-THE-OWLS? WHERE ARE THE OWLS?


welcome to the internet pls follow me




June 7th, 1942: Edward Hopper completes his best known painting, the seminal Nighthawks. When asked by a Chicago Tribute reporter about the philosophical meaning behind the diner having no clearly visible exits Hopper responded, “Shit. Fuck. I did it again. Goddamnit. Fuck. Not again. I did it again. Shit.” and slammed his hat on his leg.

how does this only have 150 notes

I fucking laughed so hard at this all artists are hilarious


i laughed SOO hard at this haha i love american dad

Si no transformas a los demonios en tu corazón, ellos te transforman a ti
Sandra Cisneros at Benjamin Franklin library (via mujeristaxicana)


Palestinian lady collects gas bombs fired by Israeli army. She grows flowers in these bombs.

What is war but losing sight of love, of beauty


“The traveler sees what he sees, the tourist sees what he has come to see.” – G.K. Chesterton


selfie game strong


"so she’s gay now?"

yeah she turned it all the paperwork last week and her acceptance letter came this morning, it was all pretty sudden


me comforting others


why are 13 year olds these days constantly drinking, smoking weed and having sex?? when i was 13 i had a stable job, a loving wife, 3 good kids, and some savings put away for my retirement. i worry about the younger generation sometimes smh

  • you:

    *opens my audio biography*

  • me:

    hi welcome to my audio biography.. chapter 1.. [begins screaming for 4 hours]